What I've learned. . . so far

Well it’s been a little over 8 months since Chad started working in Sacramento. We both feel like some change is on its way. Whether it’s moving over there or finding something else. Who knows? Either way there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Anyways two of my sister-in-laws are also in the middle of or just starting down the wonderful road of single parenting. It’s made me think a lot about what I’ve learned from all of this. I joked with my sister in law about making a list and then thought, why not? So here it is…

The Semi-Abandoned Wife: 25 things I learned while being left to fend for myself and my children

1. Take it one day at a time. Don’t count down how many days it will be until they are home again.
2. Personal Scripture Study
3. Take personal time every day, whether it’s to read a book or paint your toenails.
4. Try to get out of the house every day. It’s more for your sanity than for the kids.
5. Try to get one-on-one time with each kid. They need it that much more when only mommy can give it.
6. T.V. dinners while convenient are more expensive than actually making something
7. Keep the house clutter free it definitely cuts down on the stress
8. Get rid of things that are weighing you down like toys, clothes, and whatever else you keep but don’t use.
9. Potty training while dealing with a spouse being gone is difficult. So wait until the child is ready or you’re only going to make things worse for yourself.
10. Don’t read books that are stressful or emotionally draining it really only makes you feel that much worse. I highly reccomend Young Adult fiction Shannon Hale really pulled me through a couple of times.
11. DO NOT have a baby while your husband is gone unless you are willing to deal with the baby blues (or worse) on your own.
12. Talk with your spouse everyday if you can. Don’t just talk about how your day went either. Because lets be honest every day is pretty much the same. Write down a question for each other every day such as: what was your favorite vacation as a kid? You're trying to improve your marriage here.
13. Praying over the phone while it seems strange is very beneficial to your marriage and your sanity.
14. Playgroups and Play-dates are huge life savers. Your kids need to socialize with someone besides you even more so now that you are the only parent at home.
15. Go to the temple as often as you can. Not only to feel some peace but to experience real quiet.
16. Write in a journal or blog or something. While it’s tough it helps to throw the whining out into the universe and then you and your spouse don’t have to carry all the weight.
17. Prayer, need I say more?
18. Take a mommy time out every once in awhile. Three minutes in a corner is very beneficial some times.
19. Go get your hair cut at least every month and a half. Even if your spouse isn’t there to enjoy your beauty at least you can.
20. Take a shower do your hair and make-up every day. It somehow makes it easier to not pity yourself when you have actually done something with yourself.
21. Get a hug from someone every day. (the smallest arms make the best hugs)
22. CRY if you feel like it! You don’t have to be tough all the time.
23. Talk to another adult besides your spouse every day. My mom and sisters have saved my bacon!
24. In th words of my dad, "You are tough and good looking!" If you can do this you can pretty much do anything!
25. Love your spouse. The situation you are in is because of choices you made together as a couple. You need to deal with all the stresses and heartaches as a couple too! Once you start blaming your spouse for things it quickly leads to resentment, which quickly leads to your marriage rotting away. It’s not good!

Happy Anniversary

I can’t believe that as of this Friday it has been five years since we got married. Crazy! Its been wonderful being married to my best friend. He's a great husband and a great dad! I know he's made me want to be a better person. Love you Chad!

Here are a few of the bridal pictures I think they are totally awesome so I thought I'd include them. My Dad started doing photography stuff as a hobby about 10 years ago. I had the dress and we were going to Lake Powell so we thought what the heck lets take a few pictures if it doesn't work out we'll get them done in Utah. So here are a few of those. Frankly my favorite picture is the one of a few of my sisters and my mom in their swimsuits!

The day before our wedding Chad and I were in Star Valley helping his parents pack their home into a U-haul for their move to Reno. So after packing and cleaning for 2 days Chad and I drove the U-haul to Utah. So essentially I drove a U-haul to my wedding.

The day Chad and I got married started out very nice. But by the wedding breakfast a windstorm had picked up. Needless to say there was no power throughout the whole valley during our reception. Which worked out fine since it was outside anyways. Here are a few pictures of the lovely day. Going through them made me realize there was an inordinate amount of kissing. Ahh young love!





Yeah the look on Chad's face is that of guilt. He thought he was so stinking funny shoving cake up my nose. I let him know that someday and somehow I would get my revenge. I'm sure everytime he eats cake it is in FEAR! Good Times!

This is the week of blah!

As many of you well know being at home with the kids can get quite monotonous.  I’m just trying to do stuff to keep us all busy until its time for bed again. I don’t know why, but this week it seems worse than ever and its only Tuesday.

I’ve finally started getting ready to move. I’m no longer sitting in denial about it. We still don’t have a clue when or where or how we’ll be moving. But I’ve decided to get a jump start on the cleaning. By cleaning I mean washing my blinds, cleaning out my cabinets washing them and oiling the wood. I need to start going through all the baby junk. I’m trying to get a jump on things so that when whatever is going to happen finally happens, I’ll be somewhat prepared for it.

I feel like I’m 12 again and not allowed to do anything until I get my chore done for the day- TRUE STORY. But at least it has givin me some purpose beyond mothering my children. That and I won’t feel like such a slob if my mom comes out to help pack and move. I know she would be disappointed in the maintenance of my house. But really who has time to scrub the floorboards with a toothbrush?

By the way does anyone have a good way to get hard water off of a glass shower? I’ve tried everything from CLR to toilet bowl cleaner- which stripped the nickel finish on my hardware but did nothing to the hard water. I’m to the point where I’m about ready to bust a razor blade out. And since the last time I cleaned with a razor blade it ended in stitches through my thumb nail . . . okay we won’t get into that because it’s gross. Needless to say I’m fighting a losing battle being only armed with a squeegee and various toxic and useless cleaners.

Summer Lovin!

Well it’s been 5 years and 1 day since Chad proposed. He got this strange idea to dress up like a rodeo clown and propose at the Star Valley Rodeo. Good thing he didn’t follow through with that or I may have said no!

Chad’s family lived 2 ½ hours away so we sort of went to eachother's houses every other weekend. I was in Star Valley visiting him. We woke up to rain and cold. I honestly don’t think Star Valley’s temperature has ever hit higher than the low 80s.

Chad kept insisting we go four wheeling. I -being the party pooper- did not really want to go four wheeling in the rain. But Chad and his mom kept insisting we go. So we got all bundled up to go. Chad even donned his lovely cowboy boots. We rode up Wikiup Canyon (sp?). Lucky for us some rancher was keeping his cows around where the trail was. So we got some "extra-special mud" on us on our ride.

We finally reached the top and I was pretty cold. Star Valley is pretty anyways but it looked really green and had breaks in the clouds here and there. That alone was worth the ride. Well Chad and I looked at that for awhile and then he decided we should pick flowers. While doing this he started singing which I found odd. So I’m standing there freezing while Chad picks flowers. Then he comes over and hands the little bouquet to me. He then got on one knee and busted a ring box out from his boot. He then asked me to marry him. Obviously, I said yes.

So I got proposed to in the cold and covered in cow manure but it sure was worth it! I love you Chad!

Our little vacation. . . sort of

We finally went to Sacramento to visit Chad. The guy who Chad shares an apartment with was working in Reno this week. We had fun just being able to see Chad after he got off work. The apartment he is in is furnished and he even has cable (a luxury we don’t’ have at home). Unfortunately they don’t have anything in the kitchen including plates and silverware. So Chad didn’t get to come home and eat. But it was nice not having to cook. Lets be honest, it was nice just to see Chad. If we go again I will be packing some cooking stuff so we don’t have to go out.



Across the street from the complex he lives/works at is a nice park with a jogging path and 4 baseball diamonds. There is also the biggest behemoth of a playground. Seriously this thing had 8 slides attached to it; I counted 3 times to make sure. These are pictures of it from both sides and I honestly think the pictures don't do the thing justice. They even had a little water park and a toddler playground as well. Cowboy had a ton of fun playing on it Thursday night and Friday morning. It was big enough that I had to walk around it to keep my eye on him.



We also played a little baseball. Cowboy started out pretty far away from the sprinklers, but every time he hit the ball he'd pick up the tee and bat and walk to where he hit the ball last. So he ended up in the sprinklers. But it was a pretty warm day so it didn't matter a whole lot. the buildings in the background are where Chad works and lives.

Rock n Roll!

Well a few weeks ago Chad and I were at the temple. Halfway through the session we experienced a small earthquake. That’s when I thought to myself, "Self, if I'm going to die this is the place to do it." I'm pretty sure it was around a 1 or 2 on the Richter scale. The Reno temple is on the North side of town and we live on the south side in a condo. Our old apartment is on the North side and it makes me glad we moved. The extra 600 square feet of living space was also a bonus.

Northern Reno has been the epicenter of a bunch of little earthquakes since late February. None of them have been any bigger than a 3.2 and we’ve really only heard about them on the News. Thursday there was a 3.7 that shook the house and Cowboy told me the wind was shaking it. We'd only felt little tremors until last night.

At around 11:30, I woke up to our whole house shaking. That sure was fun let me tell you. My immediate thought was "get the kids" but before I could even get out of bed it was over. I don't know how I fell back asleep. Ever since the California earthquake (I can't remember the name of it) when I was in 5th grade I've sort of been paranoid about earthquakes. I think it has something to do with my teacher telling my class that Utah was over-due for a big one. She also felt inspired to tell us that when it hit, the waves would bounce off the mountains and make it even bigger. I know it was very comforting to my 10-year-old mind. Anyways. . .

Somehow I fell back asleep. Can I just say that Chad didn't move an inch and the boys slept through the whole thing. Well when I woke up to feed Mooch at 2:30 the news said it was a 4.7, the biggest one so far. According to the news usually there is one big earthquake and then the smaller ones. But apparently we are working backwards? So there have been a lot of little earthquakes and one bigger one, at least they are hoping that was the big one. Well after reading through our renters insurance we're not covered for earthquakes. So guess what I'm doing today!!!

sorry!

I guess I should clarify. Chad is still working for Pacific West Builders and he is still married to me! He is working in Sacramento Monday through Friday and home on the weekends. But I guess in around June they'll have a project back in Reno.